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stephen vanceStephen Vance - "The Dangers of Legalism".  This MP3 audio download message is part of the 2005 Homesville Ontario conference for young people.  The theme was the danger of "isms" in the christian life and how to overcome them.  Other speakers included Materialism, Narcissism and Intelectualism.
What do I do if my Christian friends have different standards for their children? Print E-mail
Is there a way for believing parents to have standards for their children that differ from the standards of other assembly believers without belittling those other believers?

If joy really depends on obedience to Christ (John 13:17), then Christian parents will want to model and teach their children submission to Gods Word. "The fear of man bringeth a snare" (Proverbs 29:25), so obeying truth because of what others think confuses the crucial lesson of personal accountability to God. Parents set the standard for their child and explain in a manner appropriate to the childs maturity the Christian truths that influence this decision. If the child points out that another assembly family doesnt do the same thing, the parents have at least two truths to model: personal accountability to God; personal responsibility to others. Modestly, a Christian parent must uphold what He understands from Gods Word. Thats personal accountability to God. Personal responsibility to others includes showing respect for them. This may mean recognizing that they too want to please the Lord, want the best for their family, or are perhaps dealing with circumstances of which others are not aware. It may mean simply expressing respect, yet admitting an inability to understand their decision. By responding in a way that makes his children feel superior to the children of "that other bunch" or makes the other parents seem less spiritual, a parent has not "honored others" (1 Peter 2:17) or modeled biblical standards.

D. Oliver
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